Zartilda's Journal (And Assorted Tales)

[Theprettiestorc]

Journal 10: Providence

Recovering now, and not wounds. It's been strange, having a metal arm. A contrast to the normal one, and feeling as my hand, my extension... but also different, in ways it's hard to put into words. I can still feel that old lingering sensation of burning that plagues me, causes me insomnia, from when I snapped from the presence in Narazri's forge. I can still feel a dull pain, as if throbbing, a ghost of flesh and blood. All the things that hand had done. But if I feel all of that, then the presence of metal does not matter - it is a part of me, a new part, that I must make do with. And, perhaps, do more to, in time.

Training, training, and more training has gone on, and the clashes seem to have fallen out of thought for the moment. At least, in the face of betrayal, crazy things. An Imperial defected, who had been a partner to Syllel, the part-Arkaanian girl who kept working the impossible. But she turned against everyone so many times, burned so many bridges, and whereas she had such grand plans, it didn't matter if she made the dumbest oversights and stupid little mistakes. Lashing out, a violent little thing. Ultimately, dead in a blaze of glory alongside a measure of her assets.

... with a hefty sum of credits sent to me, with a note that she'd died. I wonder how long she'd prepared it? By the end, I wasn't defending her, but condemning the outright ganging up of multiple Sith.

Tem says I shouldn't treat them like kids, and... I'm working at it. Some are better than others, but there's been a level of growth. Vayek's fast to react to an explosion and protect people, Emlar put aside grievances to ask me to help Charsette when her head was going bad. Esme put aside words for the bigger picture. Rhave stole the entire show outright, by creating a ritual that absolutely devastated the forces at Ridgeside. The Dark Lord approves of him, and while it'd irk me a little, I wouldn't be surprised if he made Household Sith before me.

They're learning far more than it was in my capability to teach. Not always for the better, but not entirely for the worse, either. If I have to be critical, I was a good teacher, but a terrible Overseer. I did exactly what I needed to in disseminating abilities deemed vital for the improvement of the House - Bubble, Mental Barrier, Protection, Jump, Speed. Basic things that everyone should have some proficiency in to combat Jedi, or a wide range of threats. In that way, I've done my part, shored up the House.

Either way, things have progressed. We moved back up, reclaimed lost ground, and even gained some. Naile's alive, awaiting trial because the Republic are convicting him or some dumb shit. Things were low, but things are higher now. We cleared some refugees for a new mining site, and it was hard-won. We got through Ridgeside, with all of our preparation, new tech. Shield Crawlers, a massive EMP. I led a charge towards the Command Center... and trench by trench, we progressed. But the third trench, a half-dead guy shot fire at me. Before I could defend, Viren had a Bubble over me - Nivalis was grabbing the guy and slamming him down. I had the opportunity to push the fluid back at him, and he burned, inside and out. It would have been a horrifying sight, once, but...

"May your path be lit and your enemies burned." -Charsette

... a prayer, a blessing. And it's been happening, over and over. I took it as a sign. A sniper that had knocked Krassus on his ass was still active - so I taunted him. Used all of my prowess, and practice... and a move that shouldn't have worked, did. I returned a shot right back to its owner, I felt the life snuff almost instantly, the man tumble down the tall cliffside into a ravine. I don't think I could pull it off again anytime soon, but I've been feeling stronger and stronger lately. It could have been nothing short of providence, plain and simple.

I... believe, I think, for real.

I've also become a handler for a quartet of Sarias' special Sithspawn-Gizka - Eenie, Meenie, Miney, and Moe. They're neutered boys and they're very good at clubbing the shit out of normal Gizkas and eating them. I'm training to bond with them.